Hearing the Heart of Your Spouse

Updated: May 20


After they had eaten and drunk in Shiloh, Hannah rose. Now Eli the priest was sitting on the seat beside the doorpost of the temple of the Lord. She was deeply distressed and prayed to the Lord and wept bitterly. And she vowed a vow and said, “O Lord of hosts, if You will indeed look on the affliction of Your servant and remember me and not forget Your servant, but will give to Your servant a son, then I will give him to the Lord all the days of his life, and no razor shall touch his head.” 1 Samuel 1:9-11 I'm not sure when I first realized it – and I can't remember the exact day or hour it happened. But it is something that I now long to hear. And it happens often when my wife and I pray together. What is “it”?: I hear my bride's “heart” expressed in the words she prays. I hear her express things as she cries out to the Lord that truly are the cry of her heart – for our marriage, for our family – in every avenue of our lives. In the above passage, Hannah was calling out to the Lord in desperation. We see her emotions since the text shares that she was “deeply distressed” and that she “wept bitterly”. She had not been able to conceive a child in all the years of her marriage, so she was crying out from the depths of her heart for the Lord to give her a son. And the Lord granted her heartfelt request as she was the mother of Samuel the great Old Testament prophet. The Lord wants us to pray from our heart as Hannah did, and as many others did in the pages of Scripture. But we don't have to be in anguish, as she was, to pray from the depth of our heart. “We can pray fervently out of joy, love and positive emotions as well. We can express our thankfulness to God for wonderful things like marriage, the birth of a child, healings, the beauty of His creation and the way He has fulfilled our needs. We can rejoice in the knowledge of His truth and the perfection of His plan. Whether in anguish or joy or thanksgiving, every one of our prayers should be from our hearts.” (1) The opportunity we have to hear our spouse's heart as they pray is one of the main reasons I strongly encourage every couple I counsel to pray out loud together. This out loud prayer, as husband and wife, opens up, at times, a window into the soul of my spouse that I may not hear any other way. Do you want to grow your connection with your spouse? Do you want to understand more of his or her heart? Then I strongly encourage you to take the step of faith and pray out loud together with your spouse today. It is a step on the journey to a deeper connection as a couple that I don't want you to miss!


QUOTE: Nothing tends more to cement the hearts of Christians than praying together. Never do they love one another so well as when they witness the outpouring of each other's hearts in prayer. – Charles Finney Suggested Prayer: Lord, I thank You for giving us Hannah's example of heartfelt prayer – prayer that You heard and answered. Help us as a couple to more and more consistently pray prayers from the heart – prayers of desperation as well as prayers of rejoicing. Help us to care less about how we sound in prayer than truly deeply connecting with You through those prayers. And may the words of our mouths as we pray be full of thanksgiving and truly glorify You. In the Name of Jesus!

SOURCES: (1) Online Post: https://lifehopeandtruth.com/god/prayer-fasting-and-meditation/how-to-pray/prayer-from-the-heart/

(2) Finney Quote: https://www.azquotes.com/quote/418022?ref=praying-together



AUTHOR: Glen Solberg is a man who is passionate about marriage - his own and the marriages of those around him! He and his wife, Shawn, have been married since 1992 and have been investing in the marriages of others full-time since 2003. You can find out more by going to the About Page.


Written by Glen Solberg, Marriage Revolution, 2018. All Rights Reserved. If you have questions or suggestions, you can connect with us via our Contact Us page.